I have always had a motivated and driven personality.
Whether it was in school, work, or training, I strived to be the best. Most
people would say that is a good thing, striving to be the best, but I beg the
differ. I think striving to be YOUR best and striving to be THE best are two
different things.
When I was constantly striving to be the best, I found
myself in constant anxiety or as a failure. I came to adopt an “all or nothing”
mindset that set me up for failure almost every time. I found this mindset
extremely detrimental when I began training for my first fitness competition. I
was relentless on myself if I only got in one of two workouts for the day,
basically I was a failure if I was only at the gym for 90 minutes instead of
120. I was a failure if I had a bite of anything off of my “competition meal
plan.” Tomatoes weren’t on the plan, so no tomatoes here.
And then it came to the cheat meals on Saturday, you would
have thought I was a starving child. I would eat until my heart was content, or
my stomach couldn’t extend. All in that one meal. Feeling bloated and disgusted
on Sunday, I would head to the track. Not taking overall in a show meant that I
was a failure. It didn’t matter that I had gotten in to the best shape of my
life, that I had inspired hundreds of people around me to be healthier, or that
I had learned about myself along the way.
This vicicious cycle continued after the competition. I
would guilt myself into spending 2+ hours or more at the gym everyday. If I
wasn’t at the gym by 7 am I was already failing at the day. I was disgusted
that I didn’t maintain my physique from the stage. I wouldn’t eat fruit that
wasn’t on my former meal plan, I created these ridiculous standards of living
that made it almost impossible to succeed.
I miss competing and I will get back to the stage, but this
next time it will be a completely different person stepping foot on stage. This
time I will have a balanced mindset. What does this mean? If I can’t fit in 2
workouts, I will realize it is okay. If I am out to dinner and I want a fry off
of someone’s plate, I will have a fry. Not my own order, but a few fries.
So whether you’re thinking about competing, starting a new
workout regiment, or a lifestyle change, release yourself now from the
all-or-nothing mindset. How many times do we vow to start our new workout plan
or “diet” on Monday? We slip up on Tuesday and then vow to start on the
following Monday because we already “ruined” the week. How ridiculous is this? Our health is a
continuum, it doesn’t have days associated with it. Our body will not know if
it is Monday or Wednesday, so you can release yourself of that! Rather, take
things one-step at a time and practice moderation. If you miss a workout or eat
a piece of chocolate cake, be okay with it, and move on. Do not associate your
worth to a choice.
Strive to be your own best before being THE best. There are
a lot of things that go on in life that are outside of our control, roll with
it. Control what you can, and even if you slip up, be okay with it. Life is a
journey and should be enjoyed!
Be your best today! Tweet me your thoughts @kelleyvargo
Xo,
Kel
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