How many times do you tell yourself, “I LOVE YOU?” Seriously,
think about it.
We are all so critical of ourselves. And not to put anyone on
blast, but one of my mentors and friends is constantly calling himself “sponge
bob” and “bloatamus maximus.” I thought I was the only one who stared in the
mirror and criticized myself for my imperfect thighs, missing definition on my
stomach, or my bunion (thanks Grandma Vargo). Want to feel the depression even
more, let’s pull out those competition photos where I weighed 114 lbs and had a
9 percent body fat, yeah that can get depressing.
Why do we place emphasis on our exterior being? Seriously, what
is it? We wouldn’t walk up to someone else and say, “ Um, yeah you’re having a
fat day” or “God, you disgust me.” But yet, it’s absolutely normal and okay to
speak like this to ourselves? For being rational beings, we can be so
irrational. Coupled with our irrational
thinking is our emphasis on the negativity. I cannot tell you how many mornings
I would beat myself up relentlessly if I was not at the gym by 7 am. It didn’t
matter if I was up late writing a term paper, working on a presentation, or I
don’t know being social on occasion. I wasn’t good enough and if I ever wanted
to have the perfect body, well I better get my crap together.
Competing was great experience and super empowering. However, the downside of it was a mental disaster! If I thought I had
self-esteem and body issues before, HELLO! And it’s not to say I won’t step on
stage again, but I have learned through hours of self-talk (both positive and
negative) as well as mentoring from some of the best in the industry that I
cannot attach my self-worth to my physical appearance.
And let’s be honest, Facebook and Instagram aren’t exactly
doing us favors. How many times do you check either one to see someone else
lost 15 pounds and find yourself comparing? It’s an endless cycle; well, if you
let it be. You can try diet after diet, counting your calories, getting surgery,
buying a new wardrobe, changing your hair, but the fact is all of these are
band-aids. You might feel good for an hour or a day, but you will return back
to the person you were before that change, having a disdain for your body and
more importantly yourself.
It really boils down to
loving yourself, and loving your body, no matter if you are 105 lbs or
175 lbs. Yes we can all have fitness goals and aspirations to strive for, but
the second you begin hating your body, you have sabotaged your journey and your
true happiness. For there is nothing
more beautiful than a beautiful soul, and beginning with that, you can take
your fitness (and life) goals anywhere.
And as Sex In the City Star Samantha once said (and Jill Coleman quoted to me during a heart to heart) “I'm
gonna say the one thing you aren't supposed to say. I love you... but I love me
more. I've been in a relationship with myself for 49 years and that's the one I
need to work on.” We all can
channel a little Samantha in our lives!
Today, I challenge you to look in the
mirror and say, “I love you!” and say it until you feel it! Love your body,
love yourself!
Love you too ;),
Kel
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